Yes

The answer is yes.

When I am asked if other law enforcement officers being killed in the line of duty brings it all back, the answer is always yes.  It brings back the horrible shock and loss of May 18, 2016 when my son, David Glasser, a Phoenix Police Officer, was killed during a burglary attempt.

The recent line of duty death of Officer Eric Talley from the Boulder Colorado Police Department has been such a tragedy.  Brave and fearless, he ran toward the danger just like all Police Officers do.  There were so many lives lost that day, so many other lives devastated.

My husband and I moved from Phoenix to north of Denver last year so Boulder feels very close to us.  I can’t stop thinking and praying for Officer Talley’s family, friends and co-workers.  My broken heart understands the pain they are experiencing and the struggles yet to come.  I know they are waking up each morning hoping it was all just a horrible nightmare…….

and then letting the tears flow as they realize it wasn’t.  Their world has shattered…..

and it will never be the same.

Seven fatherless children left behind.  My own two fatherless grandchildren.  That’s the hardest part for me on this extremely tough journey of being a survivor of a line of duty death.

I relive these feelings every time I hear of another officer being killed.  The invisible cloud of grief in my house with Davey’s name on it becomes more evident whenever we lose another hero.

Too many people don’t understand that each death of a Law Enforcement Officer is a tragedy for all of us.  These are the courageous people who live in a thin blue line between the innocent and evil.  Police Officers stand between you and the people who want to make your neighborhood, your city, a dangerous place to live.  They put themselves in harm’s way each day for us.

When good guys lose, we all lose.

And we have all lost another hero.  Officer Talley was a man dedicated to making a positive difference in our world.  A man willing to stand up against what is wrong and help make it right.

Those of us left behind will remember and honor Officer Talley for his bravery, commitment and sacrifice.  Let’s also figure out things we can do to show appreciation for the men and women who put on their police uniforms everyday and stand in the way of danger for each of us..

The Thin Blue Line just got a little thinner.

Officer Talley – Fallen but never forgotten.

Davey – Miss you more today.

Love you.

A Very Long Season

I am in a very long season.

My son, David Glasser, was a Phoenix Police Officer who was killed in the line of duty on May 18, 2016.  My world turned upside down and then crumbled before it exploded.  You get the picture.  It caused an earthquake in my life that was 10.0 on the Richter scale and the after shocks just keep coming.  There has been a domino-effect in all areas of my life these last 5 years and the dominos just keep falling.

The fall-out hasn’t stopped.  And now I realize that it never will.  My life here on earth will always be missing Davey.  Every holiday, every person’s birthday in my family along with his own, every family and friend gathering and every anniversary will have a hole – a 6’5″ hole.

Before Davey’s death, I often would write something like “praying that God will give you peace and strength during this season of grief’ on sympathy cards to people who had lost someone they loved.  I don’t write that anymore because grief is not a season for people like me.  Grief is now a permanent part of my life here on earth.  I will be feeling the affects of losing Davey until the day I walk into my forever home in heaven, hand in hand with Jesus.  Only then will my grieving be over.

As I have shared before, I am gradually getting used to the pain and loss of Davey’s death.  I’m growing used to watching my hopes and dreams for my life with Davey continue to be blown away in the cruel wind of reality.

I’m getting used to missing Davey.

But that doesn’t stop the tears as my long season of grief continues.

Love you, Davey.

 

We Stand Apart…

and we stand together.

The Thin Blue Line stands between the innocent and the evil ones.  It stands between peace and violence.  It stands between right and wrong.

The Thin Blue Line stands for honor and respect.  It stands for order and discipline.  It stands for courage and personal sacrifice for the greater good.

There is a vocal group in our country who does not value honor, respect, order, discipline, courage and personal sacrifice.

But we do.

There is a reason why the Police Officer’s badge is in the shape of a shield and is placed over the officer’s heart.   Their responsibilities require a level of commitment and courage that only comes from a huge heart.  A caring heart.  A warrior’s heart.  It’s their most important weapon.

#8144 was the badge of my son, David Glasser.  He was wearing it over his heart when he was shot and killed in the line of duty on May 18, 2016.  He loved being a police officer – it was in his DNA.  He loved the people in his city and he died serving and protecting them. 

Police officers are the truest guardians of freedom in our country.  We have witnessed outstanding examples of this in this last year as police officers protected one group of people’s right to assemble and freedom of speech while also protecting those who are not part of the assembling if violence and mayhem started.

Most people cannot imagine how hard it is to achieve this line in an unknown and super-charged environment.

Our Police Officers live it.

Our Blue Family includes the Thin Blue Line along with all of the rest of us who love and support our officers.

We believe in respect.

We believe in loyalty.

We believe in honor.

We believe in justice.

We believe in enforcing the law of the land, even when it’s not popular in some places.

And we never forget our fallen heroes who stood for justice over personal safety.

Because of our values, we stand apart from those who don’t believe in these things,

and we stand together.

Miss you, Davey.

Love you.

Survivors

The word “survivors” used to make me think about people who have lived through shipwrecks and plane crashes.  These were people who had experienced the ravages of tragedy first hand and had lived through it.

Right after my son, David Glasser who was a Phoenix Police Officer, was killed in the line of duty on May 18, 2016, people started calling my family ‘survivors’.  Lost in shock and pain the first year after Davey died, it didn’t make sense to me.

Now it does –  I definitely feel like a survivor.

Sometimes my life since the day Davey was killed seems like a train wreck that hasn’t stopped yet.  Railroad cars filled with my hopes and dreams of what my life was going to be like with Davey in it keep coming.  But the track broke almost 5 years ago,

and the cars fall off the track –

one by one,

down…

into a deep,

dark

ravine.

There’s a big pile of my broken dreams at the bottom of this ravine.

And the cars keep coming,

they keep falling.

The pile is growing bigger.

Other days, it feels more like we were all on a ship that was hit by an enormous hurricane.  The storm was totally unexpected.  It was huge and ferocious. When our ship crashed into the rocks and the storm lifted a little, we were washed up on an unknown shore – missing one very special person.

We landed in a place we never wanted to be.  But we’re here together. The old ship is gone.  We’re all figuring out how to live in this new place.

I would have never imagined that surviving was this difficult.  With a heart that is smashed into a million pieces and with a huge hole in my life, I’m learning how to not just survive in this new place, but to thrive.  God had a purpose for taking Davey to his forever home and he has a purpose for leaving me here.

The same can be said for you if you’ve been left behind after tragically losing someone.

There’s a reason.

We survive for a purpose.

Miss you, Davey.

Love you.

#8144loveyou