I’m meeting new people –
who don’t know about the tragedy that blew my life apart 17 months ago when my son, David Glasser, a Phoenix Police Officer, was killed in the line of duty.
My husband and I have just moved into a new community an hour away from our old home. And we’re starting to get to know our neighbors –
who don’t know.
So I am having regular ‘getting to know you’ conversations and people just don’t realize the landmine they are stepping on when they ask me if I have any children.
Yes, I want people to know me and I want them to know about Davey and his death. It’s just a very tough thing to bring up in the middle of a conversation with someone I barely know.
Depending on the emotions rolling through my heart that day, talking about Davey can start the tears rolling down my face. That’s a real conversation stopper.
Don’t get me wrong, I love to talk about Davey and all the great things about him. But some times on some days, there are very strong emotions tied to this subject. When emotions make the situation feel awkward, I change the subject as soon as I can and talk about my daughter and son-in-law who are having their first child in February. Babies always bring smiles.
This experience has taught me a couple of things about ‘getting to know you conversations’. They are not as superficial as they seem. Most people have various bruised and tender spots in their lives that can be difficult to talk about. We can’t avoid the landmines because they are often a central part of a person’s life and it needs to be included in who we are. So we share the hurt and we share the emotion and we share the awkwardness.
And – in the end – we know each other a little better.
That’s a good thing.