Standing Here

I’m standing here …..

surrounded by the rubble of my dreams.

They were my dreams for the future of my son, David Glasser, who was a Phoenix Police Officer killed in the line of duty on May 18, 2016.

There are times when the piles of my broken hopes and plans overwhelm me.  So many good times with him snatched from my life.  So much happiness and so many smiles that will never be.

He planned to retire from the Police force and get his teaching certificate.  He wanted to teach in high school and coach high school basketball.  He would have been an awesome teacher and an even greater coach.  I witnessed some of his potential when Micah, his son, got old enough to start playing in various sports leagues.  Davey was always beside him during water breaks, giving him tips and encouraging him.

So much has been lost.

Davey was always the responsible oldest child.   He cared for his father and I – making sure we were doing well and gor any healp we needed.   A couple of months before he was killed, my husband and I had rented an RV for a week and then drove it from Denver down to Phoenix.  Davey was not happy when he found out we had gotten back and we hadn’t let him know we were safely home.  He took his responsibilities seriously.

A couple of months before that I was driving my car with a donut (spare tire) because I had a flat tire and hadn’t had time to get it fixed.  He refused to let me drive my car to work on the freeway because donuts were not made to go that fast.  It’s not safe.  He insisted that we switch cars and he got my tire fixed for me while I went to work.

He was supposed to be here beside his dad and I as we move into the fall of our lives.  He was supposed to grow old with Kristen.  They were married very young so they could have easily celebrate 65 or 70  years of marriage.  He was supposed to coach Micah and Eden’s teams and proudly watch them graduate from high school.  Then he was planning to happily watch them graduate from ASU (if he got his way).  Sharing the joy of weddings and his grandchildren with him – it’s all gone.

Only the rubble of the dreams is left.

I’m standing here because I’m not sitting. I’m not staying in the rubble.

I’m still here because God has a purpose for me.  I’m not done yet.  So I’ll keep moving forward, going where God leads me until he calls me home –  where there are no tears, no grief, no rubble.

MIss you Davey.

#8144loveyou

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