My dreams were crushed.
The vision of what my future here on earth was going to be blew apart.
All of the smiles and love and good times that I expected to have with my son, David Glasser, were ripped away on May 18, 2016 when he was shot and killed in the line of duty.
There are places in my life that are filled with disappointments from all I have lost. Actually, calling them disappointments is like calling a hurricane a little rainstorm. I’m disappointed when my team doesn’t win, I’m disappointed when a friend doesn’t text me back – those are disappointments.
Davey’s death caused devastation.
It was a crushing blow.
All that was left of my hopes and dreams of his future and my part in it was dust. How do I deal with the dust? What do I do with this leftover little bit of an extremely important part of my life?
I didn’t know. I just knew I didn’t want to go down the angry and bitter road that I’ve seen some survivors go down. I didn’t want to go the hopeless route, blaming others for my unhappiness.
I didn’t know what to do with the dust so I gave it to God. I trusted that the Creator of all Things could do something with the dust …..and he has. As I have watched, I am seeing him begin to create a new part of me in the empty space – something stronger, more compassionate, increasingly solid and based on his truth. He has helped me refocus my eyes off of this world which is not my home and onto my next ‘forever home’.
God has given a purpose to my dust and is remolding me through the devastation that has happened in my life. It’s very evident that he’s not done. He is in the process of re-creating what my future looks like on this earth.
For now, that is enough.
Miss you, Davey.