Do you know I have written a book? My son, David Glasser, was a Phoenix police officer when he was killed in the line of duty on May 18, 2016. I started blogging about his life, his death and my journey to find hope again about 6 months after he was killed.

Many people told me I should write a book. But I didn’t know how to write a book. God made it evident that he also wanted me to write a book when he sent me an angel who was also an freelance editor and she helped me write it. She put it on Amazon for me. Her name is Natalie. God can be very clear and direct when he wants to be.

When I sat down to write the whole story, I was surprised at how much I had never blogged about. Some of the most heart-breaking moments in that first week never came out in my blogs. There was an enormous amount of pain in going back through all the details but there was also a washing away of the fear of more bad things happening. More tough, hard things have happened since Davey’s death but God has helped me through all of them. He is my Rock. He has also taught me a process that helps me be resilient in times of heartbreak and trial. It’s in my book if you want to know about it.

When I started writing the book, I thought it would be a relatively easy process of organizing my blogs. I was so glad I had started writing down my emotions and reactions early in this journey because my feelings and thoughts gradually changed. As I read my early blogs, it was easy to see my progression of going through the steps of grief. There were some very raw emotions that I processed through.

I am extremely thankful to God for helping me feel the grief so I could work through it but not get stuck in the grief.

I had planned to call the book “When the Worst Happens” but gradually realized that it was about so much more than just the worst happening. It included my journey to find hope again after my life crumbled. I needed hope. Hope that there could be a good tomorrow again. Hope that there were still going to be smiles and good times. Hope that my family could find a way to create a positive future while taking all of our great memories of Davey with us.

So the title of the book is “Then I Looked Up: Losing a Child, Finding His Legacy of Love”. I said “then I looked up” several times in my book. Sometimes I looked up and saw my husband and my daughter and two grandchildren, Davey’s kids, and I knew that I was going to have to figure out how to rebuild my shattered life. My family was going to have to find a new, very different path in life and I needed to do whatever it took help make that happen.

Many other times I looked up to God, asking for strength and peace in the middle of the storm of losing Davey. God stayed right beside me and he held me steady when everything around me shook. He still does that today when bad things happen and the world turns dark.

I’m including a couple of the first paragraphs of my book here.

The book starts 10 1/2 years ago –

“I was driving home from work – like I had done for over 33 years.

It was Wednesday, May 18th, 2016. I had just taken my leadership team from my office out for an early happy hour to celebrate birthdays and accomplishments. After having a glass of wine, I was starting to feel the stress of the day melt away.

Little did I know that a tsunami was forming in a part of Phoenix called Laveen and it was coming my way. The waves of destruction were growing bigger and stronger and darker as each moment passed. A deadly drama was being played out that would totally blow up my world.

It felt like a normal Wednesday to me – until my cell phone rang.”

That’s just the start of story. The book is on Amazon is you would like to read the rest.

Miss you, Davey.

Love you.