The Love You Cruise 2018 set sail yesterday from San Juan, Puerto Rico.

Two months before David Glasser, my son who was a Phoenix Police Officer, was killed in the line of duty, he and his wife, Kristen, went on a cruise with a group of his squad members and their wives.  We are so glad he and Kristen went!  It was a great time of making special memories that can never be repeated.  Because Davey is no longer on this earth.

But we are. Good times are better when they are remembered together and this is a great time to make some new fun memories.  That’s what the Love You Cruise is all about.

One of the major lessons we have all learned these last two years is how short life is – how unpredictable life is.  Don’t put off having fun until tomorrow.  We need to take advantage of every opportunity to love each other and laugh.

And that was a big part of who Davey was – having a fun time and loving people.  He was also planner so he was constantly planning his next good time.  Before his cruise was over he was already talking about the next cruise he wanted to take with this rowdy bunch.  He wanted to leave from San Juan and cruise the southern Caribbean.

Davey never got the chance – but we do.  The Love You Cruise 2018.

We’ll be hitting the ports, hitting the beaches and hitting the adult beverages in memory of the fun-loving friend and son whom we lost too soon…..

much too soon.

Miss you, Davey.

#8144loveyou

For several months after my son, David Glasser who was a Phoenix Police Officer, was killed in the line of duty, I hated small talk.

I couldn’t stand it.

It was all so trivial.

You went to the store.  So what?  You talked with your sister.  So what?

It was true with everyone around me –  I just didn’t feel like talking about whatever they were talking about.  It was true at work – really?  What’s so important about this?  Do we have to talk about this right now?

It was all so, so trivial.

I had this huge thing crowding out everything else I had in my brain.  Nothing else seemed important enough to spend a breath on.  It was a strange experience because I didn’t want to talk about Davey –  it was too painful – but I didn’t want to talk about anything else, either.

So my thoughts would often get lost in what I call ‘the swirl’.

Grief, questions, pain, loss and confusion would start swirling through my brain.  Once in a while I would get fixated on a certain thought.  I would focus on it and think about it all day – it was suddenly extremely important.

Until my mind started swirling again.

I’m thankful that God gave me the wisdom to not communicate most of the things rolling around in my head  during this time.  Because what I was thinking wasn’t real, it wasn’t true – it was just my brain working through all of the stuff that was happening and figuring out where to file it.  My mind was sifting through what just happened and coming to a new reality.

The swirl began as soon as we were told in the hospital that there was no hope of recovery for Davey..  I remember walking past hallway after hallway crowded with people and only seeing bodies – no faces.  Police officers were everywhere.  Strange doctors were trying to explain inexplicable things to us.  One of the lights that we were blessed with was Police Chaplain Bob Fesmire.  Every time I see him, I thank him for what he did for my family that night.

Chaplain Fesmire walked with us through those long, so very dark hours in the hospital.  He could tell the doctors sounded like, ‘blah, blah, blah’ to us, so as soon as they left the room, he would translate what was just said into terms we could understand and deal with.  He helped as us we took each step.  Every time he would ask us if we wanted him to pray for us, I said ‘yes’.   And his prayers calmed me, reminded me that God was in control and that God was also walking right beside us.  I am very grateful for that – because I had no words. 

The swirl gradually tapered off as the weeks passed and my mind figured out my new reality.

I have a new understanding of people who have just suffered a sudden loss or tragedy.  I can see ‘the swirl’ in their eyes and I know that their brain is still processing what has happened – what they say may or may not be true and it will probably all change as they come to terms with their new situation.  Their current mental reality is a jumble of grief, shock, anger and bewilderment.  It’s  going to take some time for them to put the shattered pieces of their lives back together in a new way.

People in ‘the swirl’ need love and understanding  – and awesome chaplains like Bob Fesmire who can walk beside them.

Thank you, Chaplain Bob!

#8144loveyou

We remember.  And, if we listen closely, we can hear his voice as ‘love you’s’ echo through our heads.

Two years ago today, we lost a hero.  My son, David Glasser, was a  Phoenix Police Officer who was killed in the line of duty.  We remember and honor his commitment to the safety of those of us who live in Phoenix.  We remember and honor his willingness to put himself at great risk in order to save others.

Davey was a Phoenix native who graduated from Moon Valley High School before getting a Bachelor’s Degree in Criminology at ASU.  He was a Phoenix Police Officer for 12 years.

Davey was a family fanatic – he had a huge heart which was dedicated to his wife, Kristen, his two children and his extended family.

He was a sports fanatic – he played them his whole life and he followed them all.  He especially loved the Cardinals and Diamondbacks and all ASU sports.

He was also a people fanatic – he loved people.  He loved to make people laugh.  He loved to be around people who were having a good time.  He was fiercely loyal to those he loved and, if you every crossed that line with him, you knew it.  He didn’t have any biological brothers so he recruited brothers his entire life – some wore a blue uniform, some wore a cross, others wore Moon Valley red, white and blue, and he had a large crowd of brothers who wore Cardinal Red.

If Davey loved you, you knew it – because he told you.  He knew how quickly life could change, how – in a moment –  his life could end.  So he was fanatical about telling people he loved them and he also was adamant about hearing it back.

Davey’s watch ended on May 19, 2016.  But his love, dedication, integrity and honor lives on through the David Glasser Foundation.  There is still a lot to be done and the Foundation is proud to continue the work that David started.

Today, we pause…. we listen to the ‘love you’s….. and we remember.

The hole that my son, David Glasser, left is getting bigger.

David was a Phoenix Police Officer who was killed in the line of duty on May 18th, 2016.

Two years ago……and the hole seemed big then.  It’s only gotten bigger.

He has missed so much.  He wasn’t there for so many things he should have been.  The list of missed birthdays, the missed Christmas’, the missed Father’s days – and Mother’s Days –  is growing.  He will never get to play with his new niece – and he would have been an awesome uncle.

One of the ironic feelings I have at David Glasser Foundation events is  ‘Davey would love this – he should be here’.  And I don’t mean his ‘spirit’ – I mean the super-tall guy with the big grin on his face making everybody laugh.

So many people say the first year after someone dies is the hardest.  I would agree that it is very hard.  We have to figure out all the ‘firsts’.  Our hearts are pierced and bleeding so it’s an overwhelming struggle to do anything for the first time without the one we lost.

But the permanence of the situation becomes much more real in the second year…the second birthday….the second Christmas….  It just cannot be true that the rest of our lives are going to be like this – without Davey.  I don’t want it to be true.

For me, this is the part that is so different from when my father, mother and older brother died.  They were older than me, so I expected there would be a time when I would be here on earth without them.

That isn’t true about Davey.  He was supposed to be here while his dad and I grew old, making jokes about our move into a 55+ community.  He was supposed to retire from being a cop and become a high school teacher and basketball coach.  He was supposed to coach his children’s baseball, softball, flag football and basketball teams.  He was supposed to keep tailgating and being the life of the party.  He was supposed to be here to celebrate his children’s graduations and weddings….and his grandchildren.

It still doesn’t seem possible that he won’t be doing any of that.

It still doesn’t seem possible that we will have to do all of that without him.

I know we will…..and God is giving us the strength and purpose to do that.

But the hole Davey has left in our lives is very big ….. and it’s getting bigger.

#8144loveyou

It’s good when we get the chance to remember together.

My son, David Glasser, was a Phoenix Police Officer killed in the line of duty on May 18, 2016.  April and May bring us many opportunities to gather and remember him and all of our fallen officers.   There are several memorials here in Phoenix where we remember all the police officers who have been killed in the line of duty in our city and in our state.  May 15th,  National Peace Officers Memorial Day, is when our entire country remembers all Law Enforcement Officers who have been killed in the United States in the line of duty.  Washington, DC is the center of remembering and honoring our heroes during Police Week which is the week each year in which May 15th falls.  Last year my family and Davey’s squad spent Police Week in Washington, DC – honoring and remembering.

Remembering together helps.  It helps me not feel alone in missing Davey.  It reminds me of all the people he touched, all the people he loved, and all of the people who loved him.  You grieve with me.  You miss him, too.

For me, the best ‘remembering together’ is when we’re having a good time.  The Fallen Officer Golf Classic yesterday is one of my favorite times of remembering.  This is the second year we got the chance to get together to have fun in supporting PLEA Charities and the vision of the David Glasser Foundation.

Early yesterday morning, as the sun was rising, the fun began at the Wigwam Resort in Goodyear.

Registration was a time of reunions –

we laughed together,

we hugged,

and we saw some faces we hadn’t seen in quite a while.

Everybody bought raffle tickets to support the causes and a lot of us won very cool prizes.  I won a free four-some for golf at Karsten’s Golf Course at ASU.  Nice!  My husband is already making a plan to use it.

Some of us played golf.  Others pretended to play golf.  Those of us who didn’t even want to try to pretend to play golf volunteered to do all the other stuff that needed to be done.

The golfers had a lot of fun tasting adult beverages on the course.  Does that help or hurt your golf game?

Over 350 golfers and 50 volunteers received awesome shirts to wear to show our support of  Law Enforcement Officers and we had a great lunch together.

We laughed some more.

We hugged some more.

When we had to say good-bye the “Love You’s” floated out over the crowd.

What an incredible day!

What an incredible way to remember Davey together and support the continuation of the work he started!

Thank you to everyone who participated and volunteered!  Hope to see all of you again next year!

Miss you, Davey.

Heroes recognize each other.

They sense it when they have read about or met another person who has the same level of commitment to the greater good.  They are willing to put themselves at risk in order to help or protect others.

Of course, none of them would call themselves heroes.  But we do.  Because looking in at their lives, we see something special.  We see a level of love and courage and sacrifice in their lives that we just don’t see in our own lives.

Now I understand why my son, David Glasser, loved Pat’s Run so much.  He signed up for next year’s run as soon as this year’s run was over.  He recruited groups of friends and family every year to run beside him.  And as soon as Micah, his son, was old enough Micah was running in the kid’s run – with Davey right beside him.

I realize Davey loved to honor the memory of Pat Tillman because Davey had the heart of hero beating inside of him.

He shared Pat’s burning need to be more

and give more

and protect more. 

Davey recognized these things in Pat’s life because he had the same passions inside of him.

To us, Pat’s run has now become a remembrance of all those who served other’s selflessly and lost their lives.  Davey’s squad members proudly carry the Blue Line Flag as a way to dedicate their run to their brothers and sisters in the Thin Blue Line who gave their lives protecting their communities.

As a soldier, Pat put himself at risk to serve his country.  As a Police Officer, Davey put himself at risk every day to serve the people in his city.

And they both lost their lives because of the heart of a hero that beat inside of them.  

Dave’s spirit is at the David Glasser Athletic Complex.

I could feel it in the air last Thursday as the football players gave all their energy to doing their best, working as a team and using their skills and experience to try to win the championship.  They played a great game right after the field dedication.

I could feel his spirit in the air on April 5th when I saw all the big smiles as police officer volunteers played on the field with the kids from the neighborhood practicing various football moves and skills.  This was the Cardinals Football Skills Camp where the David Glasser Foundation partnered up with the Cardinals and Laveen Youth Sports and Raising Canes to have fun with the neighborhood kids and help them with some of  their football skills.

His athletic complex is just like Davey – really big, open and ready for fun.  It’s a perfect place to remember him and continue his legacy.

Before May 2016 when he was killed in the line of duty, Dave was fanatical about his love for sports – all of them.  Playing sports had taught him discipline, perseverance, strategy and accomplishing goals as a team.  Sports had helped make him strong and had given him a brotherhood that he never had experienced before.

Davey was tall but he was never the biggest man on his high school basketball team so he grew strong because his coach always put him under the hoop where the big guys who significantly outweighed him played.

Davey had a strategic mind – all the dots connected for him.   He used this gift well playing sports – making sure he was doing his part in helping the team move toward the goal the winning.

Davey was all about people and relationships and the ‘brothers’ he found in playing sports were some of the most important people in his life.

As an adult, sports gave him an outlet to have fun and be a little crazy – all for the purpose of supporting his teams.  It also became an important legacy which he planned to pass down to his son and to his daughter.

Davey was disciplined and committed – to God, his family and friends, and to sports.  You never had to question his commitment – it was unwavering.  That commitment also helped him learn to persevere – no matter what.   He had integrity – you could count on him to do what was right, even when no one would know.

When he became a Police Officer , Davey invested all of these characteristics and strengths into being great at it.  He was committed.  He persevered and grew strong as he was faced with the daily challenges of  fighting the evil on our city streets.  He loved the officers he worked with and it was important to him that they knew it.

Together, he and his squad worked tirelessly to take the bad guys off of the streets of our neighborhoods.  It was significant that Davey was killed in the driveway of a house in the middle of a residential area where hundreds of families live. That’s where his heart was.  These families have children.  Children who should be able to walk to school safely.  These boys and girls  should be able to ride their bikes safely down the street to their friend’s house without being scared of a drugged bad man with a loaded gun sitting in a van on their sidewalk.  Scary, isn’t it?

Our brothers and sisters in blue face these issues every day.  For us.  To help keep us safe.

The David Glasser Foundation is helping kids, parents and communities have a better understanding of how much police officers care and sacrifice every day – for us.  They are the good guys.

Davey started the work and we are continuing it – with your help.

Together, we are making a difference.  A difference that matters.  A difference that Davey gave his life for.

#8144loveyou.

I recognized it the minute I saw it.

It was Dave’s grass!

My son, David Glasser, was a Phoenix Police Officer who was killed in the line of duty on May 18, 2016.  At that time, he owned a house on an acre lot which had a big front lawn and a humongous back lawn.  All grass.  And he LOVED that grass.  Taking great care of it was his hobby.  Riding around on his mower every single week during the summer was his ‘happy place’.

The rest of us always enjoyed going to a party at Davey’s house because there was so much beautiful grass to play on.  Football, whiffle ball, bocci ball, badminton – every kind of ball and game you can imagine – all going on at the time in Dave’s big back yard.  He put in a half court basketball area which was also a favorite spot to play.  Davey has his back to the camera in this picture of him making a one-handed shot.  You can see his beautiful yard in the background.

We have so many great memories of playing with Davey in his back yard.  He was always in the middle of everything, making sure people were having a good time.

Davey’s wife, Kristen, and his kids have moved from that house so we haven’t seen Dave’s grass for a while.

Until this past week.

The David Glasser Foundation had our first opportunity to use the football field at the David Glasser Athletic Complex in Laveen for an event.  And the minute I stepped onto that football field, I realized that God had moved Davey’s grass to this football field.  It was beautiful.  Thick.  Dark green.  It almost looked fake, it was so nice.

The sod actually came from the Fiesta Bowl Charities who donated it to the Laveen School district.  Thank you, Fiesta Bowl Charities!

But I can see the Master Orchestrator at work here, giving all of us the very special gift of Davey’s grass in a public place so we can continue to play on it and make great new memories.

That’s what we did this last week.  Partnering with the Arizona Cardinals, Laveen Youth Sports, and Raising Cane’s, the David Glasser Foundation helped sponsor a Cardinals Skills Camp for 100 kids.  Nineteen of Davey’s brothers and sisters in blue volunteered to help show the kids that they care and to encourage the kids to have fun and do their best.

Great new memories!  Added to our awesome old memories of playing on Davey’s grass.

It makes me smile….. as tears fill my eyes.

Miss you, Davey.

#8144loveyou

It’s well deserved.

It’s all deserved.

It was great to celebrate with the award winners at the Phoenix Police Departments “Pride in Our Heroes” Awards Ceremony this last week.  The stories that were shared showed unbelievable courage and honor and sacrifice.

One story was of police officers grabbing the firemen’s hose to make a path into a burning house where there was a shooter holding a family hostage.  True story.

Another story was of a unit which took on the challenge of tracking down and identifying a serial killer in Phoenix.  It took almost a year of commitment and teamwork and extra effort to put this man in jail.  He’s off the streets!  A huge high five to the Thin Blue Line!

The officers who were on the scene of my son, David Glasser’s shooting were given the Medal of Valor.  The fire fighters who were on the scene along with the dispatcher who handled the call were also recognized.  Because of their courage and quick action, Davey’s wish to be an organ donor was made possible.  The heart of my hero is still beating.

We weren’t told all of the stories.   There are thousands more we’ll never hear.  We know that officers do their jobs with courage, honor and sacrifice every day and they don’t all get a medal on a ribbon.

But we all win when our Thin Blue Line is recognized and celebrated.  We all win when their stories of courage, honor and sacrifice are highlighted and rewarded.

These are our brothers and sisters in Blue.  They will say “It’s just my job” and then amaze us with the super hero things they do.  We are very proud of our Thin Blue Line heroes!

Their courage cannot be taken lightly.  Our law enforcement officers put themselves in danger to help keep our community safe every day.  Another story we heard was of an officer who noticed a car moving through a red light into an intersection with no driver.  She put on her lights and drove next to the car to get it safely through the intersection and then pulled in front of it – letting it ram the back of her vehicle to stop it.  The driver was found unconscious in the front seat, was brought the hospital and made a full recovery.  No one was hurt.

Their honor cannot be taken lightly.  Our law enforcement officers care and they face all kinds of dangers to keep evil off of our streets.  We heard a story about an officer who had a gun pointed at his face and the criminal pressed the trigger.  Miraculously, the gun malfunctioned and didn’t fire.  That criminal is in jail.   Our Thin Blue Line does these things for us all the time to keep us safe and get the bad guys off the streets.

Their sacrifice cannot be taken lightly.  There was a long list of officers who received an award because of the pain and issues they have dealt with from being seriously injured on the job.  The evening ended with the good news that the Phoenix Police Department had no deaths in the line of duty last year.  Amen!  And we all remembered our fallen officers by watching a video of the historical markers around Phoenix depicting their place of death.

Tears rolled down my face as I thought of the families and friends of all of these officers who have been killed in the line of duty here in Phoenix.  We have personal knowledge of the huge sacrifice our Thin Blue Line faces each day.

Davey’s was the last historical marker on the video.  Almost two years ago.

Miss you, Davey.

#8144loveyou.